Thursday, October 18, 2012

You're Perfect

lust by ~4ewerFairy - deviantart.com

"You're Perfect" 

There was a time when my skin crawled hearing that phrase. I was used to hearing it from men that barely knew me with the goal of conquering me in some way and believed that I would be gullible or desperate enough to swoon; or even worse, the words would come to me from a man who didn't love me the way I loved him but would text those words to me only when filled with desire and longing for me for a fleeting moment but would never actually making me feel that way in person, always leaving me in want. My resistance to hearing these two words directed to me was compounded by years in a marriage filled with expectations that were impossible for me to live up to and the consequences of my inadequacies.

I'm apart from the man I love right now, a good man...
a man that loves me back...
a man that doesn't string me along or punish me when I'm human...
a man that knows when to love me and just how much...
a man that knows when to make love to me and how hard...
a man that has known me for over a year; has seen me at my worst, my best...
a man that knows my strengths, my challenges, and my darkest secrets and loves me anyway.

This man sent me a text tonight and it said, "You're Perfect". For the first time I saw those two words from a man who doesn't worship me, he doesn't put me on a pedestal, he doesn't put expectations on me, he just loves me and waited over a year to say, "You're Perfect" to me and for the first time I truly felt it... Perfect.